View Full Version : am i being selfish?
26th September 2009, 10:45 PM
i part own 2 ponies, a cob and a dartmoor, with a friend and also own a 15hh cob on my own. my horse has just been given permission by the vet to be ridden again so i have finally found someone willing to ride her for me (im not ready mentally at the moment due to an accident).
the lady who is riding her agreed to come ride the share ponies so i could see she was capable as jazz isnt an easy ride. now my friend is getting snotty with me because she says im being selfish and hogging the lady. shes taking jazz out on short rides 3 days a week so no time to ride the other 2.
i pointed out to her this morning that id found the lady to ride jazz not the other 2 and she got quite funny with me.
so am i being selfish? jazz needs to lose more weight and get fit again, my friends daughter is quite happy riding the cob pony and so am i but we dont have a rider for the dartie even though we advertised for one.
Puss in boots
26th September 2009, 10:52 PM
You are not being selfish, your friend is by the sounds of it, and behaving in a very immature manner.
You found this sharer for this particular horse and if your friend wants to find another sharer for one of the other horses then she can look for one, simple, and i would put this to her as well.
26th September 2009, 11:19 PM
thankyou ,its not like we havent found riders for the other 2 before. and i try to do my share of the riding with the others
27th September 2009, 02:25 PM
How ridiculous, I just don't see where her logic is.
The lady is not hers!
Just because you happen to part-share horses with your friend, it doesn't mean that everybody who rides your own horse must also ride the part-shared horses.
27th September 2009, 02:32 PM
I don't think it's selfish at all, you needed someone to ride your horse and you found someone therefore obviously her priority is going to be Jazz. It's not like you were looking for someone to ride all 3 or one of the others and then you've decided you want them just to ride yours.
27th September 2009, 05:42 PM
I totally agree with everyone but just think your friend might have seen it a bit differently and maybe you should give her the benefit of the doubt. I think she probably sees that you're not riding and obviously the horses need exercise, you're choosing to exercise the one that you own outright but not the other two. Perhaps she thought that this lady was going to replace all the riding that you would normally do and obviously she's not. Do you lunge the 2 shared horses or anything?
27th September 2009, 08:47 PM
You are not being selfish - tell her to grow up!! If you are not ready to ride your horse yourself yet because of whats going on in your head, then your friend should be fully supportive of you and not be snotty because the lady is riding your horse. Your friend should be encouraging you and stop being so negative.
My Crazy Clan
27th September 2009, 10:03 PM
No your not...be careful though, your friend could turn and want full ownership of the other 2 horses.
28th September 2009, 11:24 AM
No your not...be careful though, your friend could tun and want full ownership of the other 2 horses.
i was supposed to be buying her share of the other cob from her but she changed her mind (not because of this i hasten to add).
ive never let the fact that i own jazzy too stop me from doing as much as i can with the other 2 but, as we share where they live between where she lives and where i live (about 15-20 mins away), its not easy. jazz needs mucking out twice a day plus is getting turned out for short periods so has to be put out and in twice a day, so it doesnt leave me an awful lot of spare time.
as i said earlier, im happy to ride the other cob but as the pony wont be left on his own i cant do it unless we have either a rider for the pony or someone to lead him out
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